SIBLING SQUABBLES

SIBLING SQUABBLES

READING: Genesis 37:12 – 35

VERSE: “Here comes that dreamer!” they said to each other. —Genesis 37:19

ADDITIONAL SCRIPTURE READINGS: Psalm 141:3 – 4; Proverbs 30:33

F-I-G-H-T! That’s the battle cry of kids in so many families today. Before we reach the car door, brother and sister are close to blows over who gets to sit where. “He pinched me!” “She pulled my hair!” And so it goes.

Siblings have often been rivals — even back in Bible times. Think about Cain and Abel or Joseph and his eleven brothers. Just as they did in these very serious situations, some sibling squabbles can have disastrous results.

Is there a way to mitigate the negative aspects of sibling fights? When carefully monitored by parents, can they actually foster growth? Experts list three benefits to in-house fighting:

1. Interpersonal empathy. Fights offer children the opportunity to learn how to be sensitive to the feelings of others.

2. Emotional processing. Fights give children a chance to express and process their emotions.

3. Resolution skills. Fights give children experience in establishing nonviolent solutions like compromise and cooperation.

While God can and does bring good out of even the worst situations, we can help our children grow well by teaching them how to “fight well.”

Think back: How were your relationships with your siblings shaped? Were you allowed to “fight fair” or was conflict stuffed into closets? As a result, what issues still might need healing today? How might God want to lead you forward to shape the squabbles erupting among the siblings now under your care?